I'll Walk With You

I was 17.  My best guy friend was home visiting from college. He had graduated the year before.  We were hanging out at another friend's house when out of seemingly nowhere he asked me to drive him home. I thought it was kind of funny, seeing as how his sister was there with us, and she was perfectly capable of driving. But I absolutely adored the guy, and I loved our alone time, so off we went. 

Halfway home, my friend started to get really antsy and asked me to pull over. In a grocery store parking lot he shifted awkwardly around in his seat, and told me he had something important he wanted to talk to me about. My heart began racing, and after a few seconds of avoiding the subject, I finally just told him to tell me what was bothering him.

"I'm gay," he said, and then almost immediately, he apologized. 

My mind began racing. I sat silently for several minutes while my friend, filled with emotion, told me all the things he had done to try to beat the gay out of himself. He told me he had known most of his life, and that he had finally decided to tell his family just months earlier. I was the first friend from back home that he was sharing this information with. He poured his heart out until all his words had been used up, then looked me in the eye and asked me to please say something, and suddenly, the racing in my mind became a wave of utter calm.

"Can I be honest with you?" I asked.

"Please, be brutally honest," He replied. 
"Sweetheart, you just don't act straight," I said.

We burst out laughing. And it changed my life forever.

I don't know how to describe it. One moment I was one person, and the next, I was different. I suddenly was placed in a situation where I had to react immediately to something I had never faced before. I didn't have time to consider my faith. I didn't have time to think about what I had been taught about homosexuality. All I knew was this was a person I loved dearly, and I didn't see him any different after he uttered those two little words.

All I knew is that it felt wrong for him feel like he had to apologize to me for just telling me who he was. 

This friend was one of the most wonderful humans I had ever known. He was kind, he was thoughtful, he was funny and talented. He was smart and welcoming, and always did everything he could to give to those in need. Being gay didn't change those things. Not even a little.

I went home that night knowing I would never again look at another member of the LGTBQ+ community the way I had grown up to look at them. I grieved knowing I had ever judged them so harshly to begin with. I learned in just a small moment at 17 years old, what it meant to have Christlike love for someone. 

Since that day, I have labeled myself an ally of the gay community. And I think God loves that about me. I think God sees us all the same, no matter who we are or what community we are part of.

It often bothers me when someone talks about the LGTBQ+ community being "sinful."  Is it not sinful to be judgemental of others?  Is it not sinful to be unkind? No one person's sin is any better than another's, so why do we, as members of the church, often pretend like our sins aren't as sinful?  Even if you are a person who believes being gay is a sin (which to be clear-I am not), can you at least agree that God is supposed to be the one to do the judging? 

Here's what I know:

God made people different. I don't know why God made some people straight, and some people gay...but I don't really care, and I don't think it really matters anyway. What DOES matter is that God expects me to be kind, to be charitable, and to be Christlike. And Christ didn't focus on whether a person was straight or gay, or a leper, or blind, or lame, or adulterous, or in debt. Christ loved everyone. Christ was kind to everyone. 

Be kind with your words. Be kind to those who are different from you. Focus on the good in people, and not the things you can't understand. And, perhaps, ask questions so you can LEARN to understand. 

"Jesus walked away from none
He gave his love to everyone

So I will, I will
I'll walk with you
I'll talk with you
That's how I'll show my love for you."