Where Is Jesus?

I dream in symbolism.

It's crazy. My dreams are always super vivid, and they always have deeper meaning than what's obvious within them. If I'm thinking about anything more than a few seconds throughout the day, you can almost bet I'm dreaming about it that night. 

Last night was no different. 

I dreamt I was in church. Just a regular weekly Sunday school class in the Young Women's room, combined with Relief Society and young women. White walls, blue carpet that looks like ants crawling around if you stare at it too long (if you don't know what I'm talking about...try it). There were no men in this room. 

It was just like any other ward I'd ever been to. Everyone was dressed in church dresses, hair and makeup perfect...the works...when a couple of younger ladies walked in, announcing themselves as visitors. For the most part, the women in the room were welcoming at first, but as these two newcomers began speaking, their appearances started to change. 

At first, the only thing I noticed about them was their faces. But as they began opening up a little, I started to notice they weren't dressed in what would be considered "acceptable church attire." These women were dressed in crop tops and short shorts, with flip flops on their feet, as if they were headed to the beach for the day. As these appearances began to show themselves, the tone in the room went from welcoming to a total shut-down. When it became obvious that these new women were different from everyone else in the room, they no longer belonged. 

The women stopped making eye contact with these newcomers. Whispers began. They tried to carry on business as usual but the distraction became more and more difficult to ignore.

The visitors weren't shy. They began to offer their own thoughts and insights to the meeting, which differed greatly from what the group was used to. Soon, the tone in the room went from uncomfortable to almost hostile. These women who believed so differently were suddenly no longer welcomed. Some women were so upset about it that they even started to cry. 

My eyes went back and forth as I observed the interactions, and eventually, I started asking the visitors questions. They were very passionate about their beliefs. No amount of arguing with the other women in the room was going to alter their positions. And they tried. But while their perspectives differed from even my own, I was able to see that there was some good in what they had to say. 

I began to connect with them, and started to ignore the judgements of those who started the dream out as my peers. As I opened up to these visitors, my heart was filled with love and compassion for them.  There was something difficult that they were dealing with. Something hurting them. But I couldn't figure out what it was. 

As church let out, women scrambled to get out of the room. Some grabbed their families and ran, attempting to get as far away from the visitors as possible. But I lingered, along with very few. I walked around the church, bumping into the visitors and their family members, who had been visiting other classes throughout the building. I attempted to connect with them as much as I could. Some of them were kind and just wanted to understand where I was coming from. Others wanted me to believe everything they had to say and follow them blindly. 

I made my way to the church lobby, where the majority of the people in the building were congregating. I can only describe the feeling as frantic. People were either rushing into the chapel, or scrambling out the church doors. I caught a glimpse of the chapel.  It was full of church members and visitors alike, all who were demanding the others listen to them. All of a sudden, a fire started. It was like the people in the room didn't even realize the flames were spreading. They were so focused on who was right, that everyone in the room started burning. Out in the lobby, however, the tone drastically changed with the entrance of a tall, black man, a calm, genuine smile on his face. I didn't recognize him. I had never seen him before. But I was immediately drawn to his demeanor, as were several other people with me, both members of my church and others I had never seen, or those who were visiting that day. 

At first, there had been concern in me that the fire in the chapel would spread and those of us in the lobby would be overtaken by the inferno, along with the people who were perishing within, still fighting with each other, not recognizing the blaze around them. But in the presence of this black man, I felt peace. Upon his entrance, there was no more fear in me. 

I'm sure someone reading this probably has some psychological explanation for the different pieces of symbolism in this crazy-dreaming brain of mine. But here's what I got out of it:

Members of my church, including myself, have always "known" they were right about what they teach. We've been taught to defend the church, and to never stray from it. We deem questions and concerns "apostate." We urge our members to surround themselves with people who teach the same things, and to avoid those who believe differently. We are all met with these opportunities to interact with those of different faiths, just like the women in the room with me in my dream. Some of them ran. Some of them fought. Those who fought ended up finding themselves screaming at each other in the chapel, engulfed in flames. Others were too afraid to engage with those who thought differently from them and they ran out the doors of the church. But those who stayed to connect with one another, and attempted to learn from each other, were the only ones who ended up in the presence of the man who brought safety, calmness, and peace. 

Jesus doesn't care what we believe about religion. But he does care how we listen and learn from each other. When we're too demanding that others follow us, or too afraid to listen and find the good in another's beliefs, we miss being in the presence of Jesus. 

Jesus doesn't dwell with people who think they're right about everything. And Jesus doesn't dwell with those who are too afraid to listen and learn. Jesus dwells somewhere in between, where compassion, understanding, and kindness is what's important. That's where peace is found. 

Don't turn away from someone who walks into your life with differences in opinion or faith. Find compassion. Find common ground. 

That's how Jesus finds you.